Dear Syruss,
I’m just a simple peasant with a crush on a total hunk of an adventurer. I don’t know his name though I do know he has two young sons and is a traveling mercenary with a powerful and fast ship. I just want to hold him close and run my hands through his beard. He has grown strange of late, wildly embracing hedonism and declaring himself a preacher of hell. The thing is, this only makes me want him more. How do I approach him?
~Lovelorn in Creathorne
Dear Lovelron,
How do you approach an Adventurer? WITH CAUTION!!!!!!!!!
Those guys are a mass murdering, power hungry bunch with an obsession for meddling and magical artifacts. Don’t believe me? Well ask your self this have you ever seen any of these Monsters these heroes slay put on trail of their peers? What about rehabilitating these living being into productive members of society rather than obliterating them off the Map, maybe we get to know a bit more of there goblin tribe and customs before exiting them off this beautiful world in such a quick and gruesome manor?
MAYBE we stop being so judgy when certain priests of certain churches do it to your friend when you guys do it all the time to other peoples friends…
Where was I going with this? O Yeah Adventurers or in you case the adventure of dating or getting someone’s attention.
Well I Sir Syruss, being a bonafide Love Guru and Certified G am more than equipped for this question. I have a foolproof 3-part Multi step method into getting you your Bearded Beauty.
Section One Getting Yourself Before Getting Him
1
Love yourself. A guy is much more likely to notice a girl who loves who she is and whose proud of herself and the way she carries herself. If you look like you're already happy with yourself and your life, then the guy will want to be a very large part of it.
· Learn to love being yourself. Not meeting someone else's standards of beauty, or of how a woman should act. Grab you Pike and Slay dragons be you….
· Love whatever you do, whether it's fighting in tournaments, questing for goodies, healing everyone because you simply must. A guy will be able to tell if you're content with living your life, and will want to join in on the fun.
2
Love your looks. Though you may feel like it's impossible to really love the way you look, it's easier than you think. Find three awesome pieces of armor or robes that really make you happy.
· You don't need to wear three or four layers of make-up, either. Just wear whatever tribal death paint you want.
· Keeping up good dental and bodily hygiene by showering daily, washing the guts and blood off your face after every days scruffles is important.
· Don't try to look like everyone else. If you have gorgeous curly/frizzy werewolf hair let it grow don’t shave your self down to look like everyone else.
· Don't keep checking your reflection in a mirror or window whenever you're out. This will make guys think that you're very insecure about your looks. So, save the scrutiny for the little warriors princess room.
3
Have fun wherever you go to have a good time. A guy will be much more likely to notice you if you just look like you're having a blast. Though it may be hard to look like you're ballin' if you're just gathering alchemist components or sitting in a waiting room waiting for the dungeon to change scenes.. Smile whenever and where-ever you can, and laugh often.
· If a guy sees you out with girlfriends, you'll look much more appealing if you're the one out in front scaring of the villains with you war cry rather than cowering in the back.
· Don't spend all of your time looking around the room for someone better to talk to -- if you look like you don't want to be there, a guy will take the hint, and leave you alone, obviously if you look like you don't want to talk.
Section Two roll for Initiative your first encounter
1
Walk by him. Walking by the guy will help get his attention. Just walk by with a purpose, your head held high and your posture straight and a Great Sword in your hand. Don't linger or walk like you don't know where you're going, but don't march right past him, either. Just walk slowly enough for him to notice you, to check out your cute garb, and to see that he wants to know you better.
· If you're walking towards a friend with big smile on your face, that will get your guy's attention even more.
2
Catch his eye. If you want the guy to notice you, then you should hold his gaze for just the right amount of time. Don't longingly stare into his eyes for hours casting love spells (that’s cheating) just keep eye contact for a few seconds to show him you're interested. Don't look too eager, but let him see that you'd be open to talking if he approached you. You can even give the guy a little smile to show that you want to see where this goes.
· When he does approach you, give him a coy but distinct smile to let him know that you want to start talking to him.
3
Make a good first impression. You only get one first impression, so you should make it count, try battling a dragon in one on one combat he should notice that. Once the guy notices you and comes over to you, you should be friendly without coming on too strong, and approachable and just easy to be around. Put him at ease by making a small joke or poking fun of your slain enemy, and avoid any negative or controversial topics to show him that you're fun to talk to.
4
Have approachable body language. Your body should say that you're confident and ready to talk to the guy. Keep your head raised and don't slouch or cross your arms over your chest. Avoid fidgeting with your magic items or you'll look too nervous. Instead, lean in to hear the guy talk, and even give him a light touch on the arm or knee if things are going well.
· Don't lose his attention. Keep looking into his eyes and avoid searching the room, making eye contact with your friends, or checking your spell book every five minutes. This will make the guy think that you have better things to do than to talk to him.
5
Flirt. Once you're more comfortable, you can start flirting with the guy. Tease him a little bit, and let him tease you back – hit him a little let him try and hit you but block it with your sweet sword and shield moves. You can play with your hair a bit or even lick your lips to draw even more of his attention to you. Flirting is all about keeping things light and having fun -- you don't have to tell him you think he's hot or start standing way too close to him to send him the message.
· Talk a bit more softly than usual. This will make him lean in to hear what you have to say.
Final Room section 3 Keep your captive
1
Be positive. Now that the guy has noticed you, you have to make sure that he wants to keep talking to you and appreciates the unique and amazing person that you really are. You should be yourself, but you should also work to maintain a positive vibe and to stick to topics that are uplifting, funny, and light. This is not the time to talk about your parents and how they were all eaten but wolves, unless of course it’s a morbid my parents were eaten by wolves vibe.
· Talk about the things that make you happy, like your hobbies, friends, or pets sea elves. He'll catch on to your enthusiasm.
· Don't be overly disagreeable -- even if you disagree. You don't have to hide your true feelings, but if it turns out you don't agree on something important, like your scalping beliefs, don't jump into an argument right away.
· Ask him about the things he loves to keep things positive. Ask, "What's your favorite thing to eat at feasts?" instead of, "What do you hate most about feasts?"
2
Be engaging. You should not only be positive, flirty, and fun to talk to, but you should actually be interesting. Keep up a good conversation by showing off your sense of humor, being a little bit silly, or mentioning something interesting you read or saw in your crystal ball that could lead to a good conversation.
· To engage the guy, ask him a few questions about himself to make him feel special. Ask about his interests or passions -- just don't get too personal.
· You don’t have to Just say yes. If he asks if you've ever seen a play or bardic performance, don't just say "No," but say, "No, but I heard it was amazing. What was it about?" Don't cut off any outlets of conversation just because you don't know much about the topic.
· Be witty. Impress the guy with your ability to keep up a funny and sharp banter. Don't say "that's funny" if he makes you laugh, but answer back with an even funnier comment.
3
Show what makes you special. It's great to get noticed, but guys can notice lots of girls. You should make him see what makes you so special by opening up a bit and talking about the things you care about -- just not too much. Let him know what you love to do in your free time, how much you love your necromancy experiments, or just mention a crazy experience you had, like battling the demons of hell.
· Whatever you talk about, let the guy see your passion for your life and your interests.
· You should let him see that you're special, but don't just monopolize the conversation by talking about how great you are. Make sure that you're both contributing equally to the conversation.
4
Find common ground. Finding common ground with the guy is a sure fire way to get him to keep talking to you. Whether you find that you love or hate the same sports Nation, spend your summers in the same place, or love the same bards, this is something that can keep you talking for a long time.
· If you've had your eye on the guy for a while, you might even know what his interests are. You can try to sneak them into the conversation to get the guy talking for longer. Just don’t tell him about the time you saw him reading a book while watching him from a branch outside his window.
5
Get him to ask you out. If it's going well, then you should go beyond getting the guy to notice you -- get him to ask you out. The easiest way is to use your common interests as an excuse, such as mentioning that tournament you both like is happening this weekend. You can also just give him a light complement and let him see that you like hanging out with him.
· You can be less subtle, and even mention that you want to do something fun over the weekend but don't know what -- just don't be too obvious about it.
· Now that the guy has noticed you, it's up to you to keep his attention. If you're true to your inner kick ass self and stay fun and positive, he'll be asking you out in no time at all or at least will ask for your help slaying the dragon.
So there you have it. Some of my finest love advice and a great long response to engage my readers after a long hiatus.
Remember its Like Sir Nymbous O’Leary always says about us “good relationships is someone who knows all your insecurities and imperfections but still loves you for who you are.”
I hope this helps I am sorry if it doesn’t.
Don’t Call it a Come back I have been here for years.
Sir Syruss O’Leary
Master of Love
Knight of the Blue Rose
Question Master
Knight of the Potentium
A all around good guy