The long awaited weekend arrived - my first debut as a true queen. The beginning of the title felt like some far off dream - just an off-hand comment made by someone, and it stuck. I never imagined that it would gather so much momentum that I’d be standing in front of a group of followers, willing to shed blood in my name. Thoughts circled my mind - “will I make them proud? Will I be worthy of their loyalty?”
I took on as much as I could to keep my team’s spirits up. I planned and I prepped, not to win, but to make sure that those who chose to stand by my side wouldn’t regret it.
It became so much more than that.
I was away from the team for a majority of the time, taking on many competitions - Aces, One Path, Spirit and Steel, and Cleaved all took me away from them. I can’t express how much my heart filled as I still heard their cries of my name when going into battle, even though I was across site or inside a building.
So I kept putting myself out there. Battle after battle, win after loss, I couldn’t let them down. I dug into parts of me that I thought were lost. Saegan and I often joke with the phrase “don’t believe in yourself - believe in the me that believes in you,” but damn, it rang true during Queen of Hearts. How could I not believe in myself when I watched these warriors and mages run themselves ragged in my name?
I screamed, I fought, I smiled, I laughed, I panicked, I cried, and I sang… I sang, and I finally looked up when it was done to see a standing ovation. It was then that I heard the cheers and support of the world and community that I built myself into. My team, loudest and proudest of all.
In character and out of character, this weekend has changed me. I took on leadership, and felt it’s rewards. I believe in myself again. I can see what I can do, and feel the strength of those who are not behind me, but right at my side. I wouldn’t give up any of them for the world - for we bring out the best in each other.