Written by: Quinn “Fansy” Mattes
Greetings to the realms!
For those of us that were unable to attend Invictus tournaments, I will now regale you with the events of that weekend.
On Friday evening our merry band of adventurers were invited by a demon to participate in a series of challenges to obtain a magic item, an offer that was in no way suspicious. We were told that another group of adventurers would be racing us for the item and that our new “friend” would be aiding both parties, though the demon did say he preferred our group over the other. Our first challenge was an encroaching hoard of poisonous goatfolk (or I guess venomous as to my knowledge no one ate any goat people). After a bit of fighting we encountered a puzzle lock that the more intelligent of our number solved while the rest faced down the bleating masses. We then faced a gaping chasm with a narrow and winding bridge and falling rocks that I definitely crossed with ease and didn’t take four steps then woke up on the other side. Our party then encountered a puzzle with that most insidious of mind games that has plagued the realms for decades: counting. We found numbered lights that needed to be illuminated in the correct order lest the fury of the goatfolk be brought down upon us. Through a hint left by our demonic companion the correct order was determined to be backwards from 10 and with our night vision in shambles we proceded. As we continued further into this demonic fun house the party found three dazed and confused people: an old man searching for his grandson, a mother holding a newborn baby, and a young child. It was
determined by another hint left by the morally upstanding demon that one must be chosen to die. When faced by this moral quandary, Avendar heroically chose himself and fell on his sword. While a truly moving act I shall remember for years to come it was nonetheless ineffective as this caprine hell would not be circumvented. After a lengthy discussion of who had the most to live for, who would care for either a new grandson or new baby, a concerning amount of calls for murder from the child, whether or not any of this was real, and a morbid tangent on if the baby counted as an option a decision was made. I brought my sword down on the child that was strangely gung ho for murder and all parties involved dissipated in a magical puff and the group continued. After the test of our moral fiber was passed, or at least entertained the strangely chipper demon enough to let us continue, we found ourselves face to face with the opposing group. The item was in reach and all that stood in our way was a loud and vaguely southern foe. It was a pitched battle with our healing magics dwindling when a new face to the realms named Azurite was able to sneak to the item and recover it without notice resulting in our immediate release from this challenge. All through this challenge the demon was offering to help us with clues, healing, and chasm body retrieval in exchange for future favors. The item itself was a lamp able to call our demonic patron to intervene when needed, something that will cause no future problems I’m sure.
With that concerning episode and a nights rest behind us we set off the next day for a whirlwind of tournaments. Events of every weapon combination imaginable (except double daggers to most people’s relief) in both armored and unarmored styles. There were also more complex challenges such as V’s vendetta, Duncan’s challenge, 1s and 2s, three lives and 5 points to victory. The weather held and everyone fought hard which made for a real nail biter in the standings as the first day ended with Jericho and Avendar with 8 points and Celtrex right behind them with 7. After the dinner break and a celebration of Runaris’s unicorn themed birthday (King Shandar dressed as a unicorn was a sight to behold) we moved onto the highlight of the event (at least for me): the non com game shows put on by Madame Zarine. The games started with “Besties” , a take on the newlyweds game. If you don’t know what the newlyweds game is don't worry! It was quite clear that the 6 participants didn’t grasp the concept of the game despite multiple explanations. Between the rampant bending of rules by team Jack and Runaris and the realization of team V-power and Elora that V-power’s lack of literacy would make writing down answers incredibly difficult it was a hilarious watch. Moving on to the next game show was the worst survey, which was a take on the family feud. The survey questions were answered by community members in a poll a few weeks before and it was fun trying to figure out what everyone thought the worst of the worst was. As for anyone wondering if any of us understood how family feud worked the answer is no so it was equally fun and chaotic. Finally we went to an eight person game of a legally distinct Jeopardy like game with realms based categories. This was my favorite game (not just because I got third) but because the questions covered a wide range of realms trivia that could stump newbies and oldbies alike and hearing the explanations of the questions I didn't know was everything I enjoy about hearing about the realms past.
On the final day of the tournament with the scores so close, King Shandar decreed that the top four competitors would fight an event from the Order of the List known as a grand slam. The event is split into a best of 3 rounds each with 7 sets that are best of 3 fought back to back. Each combatant alternates choosing weapon combos each set and whether the fights are armored or unarmored is decided at the start of each round. For those keeping track at home, assuming you lose every fight in every set in every round that's at least 28 fights back to back. It was some of the most intense fighting I’ve ever done and a real trial of endurance but it’s probably the most fun I’ve ever had in a tournament. The day ended with Jericho as the overall winner of the tournament with Avendar as runner up and Celtrex in third place.
With glory won and new stories to tell we depart the lands of Invictus in high spirits, if not slightly concerned about a new demonic boon in the realms. I hope to see you all on the field of competition or at my shoulder on the adventuring path in the coming days.
-Cordially Fansy