By: Ethan "JB" Goldman
You know I am more then a cannibal. I am a Epicurean. So when the Feast Of Leviathan was going to be wedding themed I happily stepped in. Why? Because I am a good person and they needed a bartender.
As a bartender let us begin with drinks.
The usual fair afforded to all Rhiassans is a mix of a light herbal spirit with a fruit juice. This is the Fruit Fizz it comes in Strawberry, Passion, Raspberry, or Peach, I am particular to Raspberry. If you take that same spirit and mix Grenadine in it it becomes a Justari Temple, which I find too sweet. I will also note my critique that lemon lime was alternated with ginger for production, against my own wishes, because these are very different tastes. Which I should know, because one is ginger, and the other is lemon, which is not ginger.
No one else noticed. But I always did.
Flavored Coffees are also allowed, which I did not partake because I only drink Earl Grey tea, or Lady Grey if I am feeling particularly fancy. I am sure it was vanillish.
But the piece de resistance, the seasonal drink the Frosted Star. Which is like if I served a Bopped Tist. If a Bopped Tist was orange juice and the same herbal spirit from the Fizz. The orange juice lends a more refined taste because the juice adds a actual bitter note.
However, moving away from the bar counter, as I often did for self care (Food), there was the signature Charcutty board. This time with a addition of a severed leg and a melted wheel of cheese.
The leg was very tasty, the curing process made it entirely threadless, the muscle fibers being obliterated. It was rather soft yet gummy. And the cheeses were…
Well they weren't labeled. There was one with veins on it that I liked.The cherry tomatoes were sweet and still on the vine so I took 3 vines, a piece of melted cheese, 3 vein cheeses, and two crackers. And a chunk of leg but not TOO big because people deserve legs too.
Poor Meatball, my son loves legs.
Eventually the board was moved for the appetizers, starting with a 3 year classic, the Tuna on seaweed. I had five of these.
There was also a chicken cooked in a eastern curry that was salty and savory in a sharp manner that cut like a vinegar through the cheeses, I had two.
In addition were baked fish cakes, and a few smaller appetizers that did not venture near me enough to develop a strong memory for.
Eventually the stations were open, which involved chocolate fondue, guacamole, and flatbread.
Personally the guacamole, while good, does not hold up on its own. Not in that its a lacking guacamole. But Guacamole is itself not a “full dish” to me, with or without chips. A salsa is needed I think. Also the saltiness of the chips chosen I believed cut most of the complexity of the guac. I tasted salt foremost, then the heat of the jalapeno added to the guac. However salt is a first taste ingredient and jalapenos are always tasted near the end so I think this was a sensorial timing thing.
My flat bread was meaty and fatty and would've been really good BEFORE The guac because the salt would've cut my grease, but that's what I get for loading meat AFTER. Letting the customer choose means the customer also gets the guilt.
Chocolate freezes really quickly. My chocolate banana was just a chocolate banna by the time i got back. Which is still good I just thought with it being all melted at the start it would’ve… changed? But i suppose all chocolate bananas start with melted chocolate so the real benefit with fondue is you can chocolate weird things. (They did not let me)
Then at the tail end, right before the wedding, was the main dish. Chicken, vegetables, and Noodles.
Which is fine, but its a lot less fancy then a whole leg, which makes sense cause everyone ate the leg so no one would've appreciated anything on the main course but it seemed a tad underwhelming given all the fancyness before. I don't know what I was expecting though, something with wine I think. Wine’s fancy right? We don't have wine in Neden so I assumed it was sophisticated.
Lastly there was cake. Which was cut very romantically and then no one ate it until court ended two days later so that felt a little strange. I feel like a cut usually announces you can eat it, Kobolds are like that you know, they rot really fast. But It turns out cake doesn't dry that fast so it was still moist and chocolate.
No one got murdered which I felt was insulting to the couple. I was told it was traditional to murder Aeston at these things but no one bothered. Oh well. I guess I’m old now.
