Friday, February 17, 2012

The Grimloch Tribune

Police arrest Theddy Quill after he allegedly punches Dell lone Seer of Grimloch during anger management class

A Grimloch soldier was arrested after allegedly punching his friend in the face during her anger management class, SYRUSS reports.
Theddy Quill, 28, of Grimloch, was taking the class due to the increasing fights the dynamic duo were causing in bars, when witnesses say he punched his friend several times in
the face and body.

Rillian, the anger management counselor apparently witnessed the incident then reported it to police and Seer Protective Services.

Mr. Quill, who is charged with fourth-degree assault had this to say, “I was drunk, we were only in the class because of him, and frankly he should have seen it coming!”

The Cutting Trend

Local Hipsters, trend setters, and Cool guy aficionados Grot and XT are making a break into the fashion and nightclub scene. They are releasing a clothing line called "Extremely Grotty" with collared chain mail shirts and armor grade Fedoras. They are quoted saying “we are putting the Great in GEAR! You know if you move the “R” around and add a “T”.

With Grots bold add more thick link chains to everything policy and XT’s revolutionary add your initials to your pants, they got this reporter saying “If its not Grot its not Hot.”

Warlord Jaha and his T.H.U.G.S (Terrors, Horrors, Undead, and Ghouls Squad)Bust Four Underage Vampires in a Blood Trafficking Ring

Warlord Jaha continues his rampage to combat Necromancy in Grimloch. This time Warlord Jaha and His T.H.U.G.S (Sir Rhode, Sir CENSORED, and Priest Syruss) shut down a major blood trafficking ring in Compton, Grimloch.

Four vampires,two females and their two male bodyguards, have been engaging local delinquents willing to sell their blood for sex.

Warlord Jaha commented on the situation: “It is a shame to see so many misguided turn to the Dark Arts, but I swear this to the good people of Grimloch the undead problem will get under control.”

T.H.U.G.S soldier Sir Rhode had this to say: “ Vampires have been getting much bolder with attacks taking place in public and on sacred ground. We are doing our best to keep everyone’s blood safe. However citizens may want to look into keeping their plasma stored in some sort of blood bank.”

Well that’s it for this addition; I am investigative reporter Syruss signing off saying “Stay Classy Realms.”