Wednesday, April 1, 2015

Super Serious and Mature News of the Realms, April 1st Edition!

The Continuing Adventures of Sir Nighthawk the Jovial, servant of Aurora!


-Chapter 23!
Can our hero Sir Nighthawk the Jovial escape the vile Necropolis of the dreaded Dark Magi Vawn the Necromancer?


We last left our hero Sir Nighthawk of Aurora and his sidekick Talon the Chaste shackled to the altar of Asmodeous as the minions of the Dark Magi closed in.  Is this curtains for our lovable heroes?  


Kids!  Don’t forget, have your tavern wench cut the proof of purchase from the back of every Sir Nighthawk of Aurora action figure - save up 5 of them and you can mail away for a special limited edition action figure of Nighthawk’s bosom companion, Sir Guilliam the Huggable!




Ripped from the Headlines!!
Order of the Spoon opens franchise chain taverns!  
Serving up sliders, fries, and powdered iced tea!  Ask about our new Goblin-Sized meals!  Now with toy surprise inside suitable for even the Knights of Creathorne.


Rhiassan cheese shop robbed again, Sir Kyntela unavailable for comment.


Ashenmark changes color scheme to Gold and Black from Black and Gold. Temorse insists it's different, somehow.


Nighthawk shows remorse, other signs of possible stroke.


Newer adventurer with stupid name blames bad parents.

Chimeron Militia in swords for plowshares scandal.  Grand Melee called to investigate.