Friday, February 22, 2013

New View From Valehaven Awards Categories by David "Callin" Dolph

If an effort to keep things exciting and new we are contemplating adding some new View From Valehaven Awards categories, including two meta-categories. Browse the following and let us know which ones you would like to see added to next year's awards. You can also let us know if you have some ideas for categories that are not on this prospective list.


Best New Monster That Only 1 Person on Site Could Affect
Best New Monster That Took the Longest to Figure Out How to Kill
Event Holder Who Gave Away the Best Magic Items
Event Holder That Attends the Least Amount of Events But is Still an Event Holder
Event With the Longest Downtime
Best New Tournament That Had at Least 3 Rule Changes During the Tourney 
Best New Prop/Costume That Was Obviously Bought at the Dollar Store
Best Plot That Got More Confusing the Longer the Plot Went On
Best After Feast Restaurant
Best Friday Night Event That Didn't Start Until Midnight

Best Cleavage
Highest Skirt
Most Broken Weapons
Most Weapons Pulled
Most Complaining About Getting Hit With Bamboo
Least Annoying Kid Under 10
Most Unnecessarily Complex Backstory
Best Sweatpants and T-Shirt Garb
Most Obviously Stolen From a Famous Fantasy Novel or Video Game IC Name
Most Unwieldy Duct-Taped PVC Weapon


Most Curmudgeonly
Most Irritable
Most Cantankerous
Most Crabby
Most Annoyed (If you don't know the differences between the top 5 - don't vote ya newb)
Most Stories About How the Old Days Were Better
Most Time Spent Sitting Down
Best Oldbie 


Best Fighter Whose Character Name Starts With "Calli"
Sexiest Player Whose Last Name Ends in "olph"
Best Event Holder That has the Same Letter Starting His First and Last Name
Best Role Model Who is at Least 6' Tall and is Balding and is Not Jarrod
Greatest Contributor to the Realms That has Two Consecutive "L"'s in His Character Name


  1. i think those last ones... the awesome awards... are... well, awesome!!

  2. I actually like those individual awards

  3. How about some Newbie Awards:

    -Most Unnecessarily Complex Backstory
    -Best Sweatpants and T-Shirt Garb
    -Most Obviously Stolen From a Famous Fantasy Novel or Video Game IC Name
    -Most Unwieldy Duct-Taped PVC Weapon

  4. You forgot the "Best looking male in a coconut bra" category.

  5. If only the realms had a "Razzies" and people could laugh at themselves (ie: not get offended).

    Hmm... Carrie will win "Sexiest Player Whose Last Name Ends in "olph"" every year...

  6. I'm going to to suggest (as I have for many years) that any instance of the word oldbie get changed to veteran. Not only does it give them (us) the respect they (we) deserve, but oldbie just never rolled off the tongue as well as newbie. D's and B's don't go together unless seperated by vowels or used as acronyms for Databases or Defensive Backs. (Do I win one of those Veteran Awards yet, or should I continue complaining...)

  7. This comment has been removed by the author.